Blame urself

Money is really important. Although there are a lot of people say money is just duniawi, today I realized without money u're just nobody.. It is not only nobody, it is no value... I still remember when I have big amount ofmoney, my mother never talk harsh with me.. When I have no money, she always pointed my mistake... And I also realize the treat she gave to all her children are different.. Although her child is delinquent but have money, she will listen to that child.. Compare to the child that is quiet but have no money, she just won't hear anything.. She told me once, what is my problem, I have to tell her so that she knows.. The moment I tell her, the only thing she does is just pointing my mistake... I only need a good listener... Its ok to point my mistake, but please tell me earnestly, not egoistly... I know that I must be the worst daughter in the world.. Every time I told myself that I have to listen n forgive whatever mom done to me to avoid the same thing hit me in future.. But whenever I try to be positive, my mom always come in the way.. Now, the most thing I have is revenge.. I really hate myself now.. But I really hope that this failure point, will become turning point for me to success..